If you want to go into business online, you will be all giddy with excitment at first (no matter how many times you’ve already done it in the past). One thing you can’t possibly anticipate—but you can count on it, because I bet it happens to everyone—is the feeling that you are being overwhelmed by bullshit. That you are simply drowning. Shit is imploding all around you, you have no clue where your money is coming from next, and people are freaking out on you. Somehow, you thought you actually knew what you were doing.
This is where your balls get broken, or they harden into brass. This is where you cry like a fucking baby, or you grit your teeth, reassess, and you fucking press on.
Being an entrepreneur takes its toll. You may or may not have heard of polyphasic sleep. Instead of sleeping an entire night, polyphasic sleepers sleep in shorter stretches more frequently.
It seems I’ve slipped into this pattern. I work the 9-5 and when I get home, I’m beat, so I take a nap. That nap is anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours. Then I wake up and I’m up until 2am working on stuff for Remarkablogger or Gateway Blogging.
I get a hell of a lot done this way, but there’s a problem. I’m never sleeping long enough to enter into prolonged deep sleep (R.E.M. sleep) where you dream. From what I’ve read of sleep-deprivation tests, R.E.M. sleep and dreaming are necessary. If you don’t get it, you get wacked out.
I can tell you from my experience that if you don’t get any R.E.M. sleep for a while, and then you do, your dreams catch up with you. With a vengeance. It’s not so much dreaming as it is being transported into an alternate reality.
When I wake up, I can’t even figure out what the hell I was supposed to be processing with these messed up dreams. Or I forget them (but not that they were vivid and bizarre, go figure).
So, pay attention to your dreams. This idea is meant to be understood on many levels. Any level is fine. All levels are true.
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Well, shit, it’s been a long time since I’ve posted here. One cardinal rule of blogging is never apologize for not posting, so I’m not the least bit sorry. Nyah.
So much crazy shit going on, amazing shit.
I’m changing my business seemingly on a whim.
The Republican vice-presidential nominee supposedly faked a pregnancy so that nobody would know that her daughter conceived a child by her son- (or brother-) in-law.
Fuel prices are going to kill people this winter.
It’s all pretty amazing, really, when you think about it.
I take turns feeling sick with worry and optimistic everything will at least be cool for me and my family. But who the fuck knows?
Dear gods and goddesses of old:
You’re all fired. Please clean out your desks, turn in your badges to security, and exit the building.
Thank you.
